Are You Grieving With Hope?

Hey, it's been a minute. I've had a lot of thoughts on Hope since we started a new Bible study by Jennifer Rothschild entitled Heaven.  I highly recommend it for everyone.  It's a deep dive into a lot of questions about heaven, what it'll be like, what we will be like, misconceptions and a whole lot of truth. It gives hope.  

Hope:  Certainty about the future because God is faithful.  

In Hebrew:  a cord, something you're tied to; expectation with tension but security.  

In Greek:  confident anticipation, not uncertainty.    

In layman's terms: I expect this to happen because God said it would.  

Why it matters:  Hope keeps faith from collapsing under grief, it gives endurance when answers don't come, and it fixes your eyes forward without ignoring reality.  (Thanks, ChatGPT)

When you believe in Jesus, you can be confident in this hope. This promise God makes to us that upon our death, we will be with Him in a twinkling of an eye. That’s quick!  It’s immediate.  No line, no waiting. When our soul and spirit leave our body upon death, they will be present with the Lord.  That is comfort.  Think of death not as an ending, but as a transition from one realm to the next.  We are trading in our earthly body, a body that "goes to sleep", for now, while our spirit continues on.  We are still fully us, fully aware, fully living.  The Bible isn't clear what actual form we will take, but like God, who is spirit, we will not cease to exist.  When the end comes, and all the dead are resurrected, we will meet up with that sleeping body once again, and it will be glorified!  At that time, we will have a body like Jesus did after his resurrection.  

Jesus died for our sins and was resurrected after three days.  He appeared to the disciples and many others in his glorified form.  He appeared fully human, and they could physically touch him, but he could also go through walls and doors and come and go in an instant.  He could also eat.  God is very detailed, and I don’t think we need to worry about our new bodies!  They will be fabulous.  Immortal - no longer a perishable body, but an imperishable one.  One that will not see decay.  Imagine Jesus pulling a glorious new body for you together out of a piece of dust - or ash. Supernaturally amazing.

Because God has always had a plan for eternity, including offering His son, his one and only son, Jesus, as a one and done sacrifice on the cross, we can have HOPE.  What does grieving with hope look like?  It does not mean an absence of sadness.  Of tears.  Of longing to be with our loved ones.  After all, Jesus wept when his good friend Lazarus died, even though he knew he was going to raise him back up from the dead.  Death hurts.  Grieving with hope means we are grieving with the knowledge that we will see them again.  We will be reunited.  In Heaven, we won't be strangers.  God is all about relationships.  We will be greeted by those who have gone before us in faith, who believed that Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life.  

This includes loved ones who took their life. That is not an unforgivable sin.  The unforgivable sin is, to again quote ChatGPT, "A settled, final rejection of the Holy Spirit's testimony about Jesus, to the point of calling God's work evil.  The Holy Spirit points us to Christ, but because you knowingly, persistently, and defiantly reject that witness, you harden yourself until repentance is no longer possible.  It is not that God refuses to forgive, it's that the person refuses forgiveness.  

That is one of the saddest sentences - one that causes evil to delight and the angels to bow their heads in sorrow.  You see, you decide whether or not you'll go to Heaven.  Not your parents, not your friends, not your church attendance history or your baptism, not God or Satan.  YOU.  It's all on you.  You can reject hope.  You can reject a beautiful eternity surrounded by a loving and eternal Father, by the one who died for you, by those you love . . .simply by not choosing to make a decision.  Or making a decision based on a past hurt or trauma.  So many people blame God for things that have happened to them, and they turn their backs on Him.  The only one who can fill that empty hole in their heart.  Friend, the default is hell.  Hell is real.  It's eternal separation from God.  From light.  Eternal darkness by yourself.  Filled with torment. Why would anyone choose that?  Why would you willingly choose unbelief?  I'll never understand it. It's pride. Thinking that you, a mere mortal,  have the universe and the God who made it figured out. You've decided HE doesn't exist. That we are all here by accident. That when we die, it's all done. Life is short, and now it's over. That is the antithesis of hope.  

So let's get personal. I have hope. I KNOW, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I will see John again.  He made it very clear that he loved Jesus and accepted Him as his personal savior.  He didn't reject that truth. He died with it.  He didn't take his life, but if he had, I would still know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was with Jesus.  Because we all sin and fall short of the glory of God, sin is sin. We cannot possibly ask for forgiveness for each and every sin we commit.  And that would fall into the works category.  And to quote Jennifer "Suicide is not an unforgivable sin.  Believers who take their own lives are not judged by their last earthy act." So I want to give hope to those of you who believe that suicide equals hell.  It does not.  But please, if you are feeling suicidal, remember, God has a plan for your life.  It WILL get better.  Please reach out to someone and please give your life to Jesus and ask him to help you!  

Also, babies go to heaven whether they are baptized or not.  I mean, I'm all about being baptized, I've had the experience three times, but it isn't a golden ticket to the afterlife.  It's a confession of faith - one probably done by your parents when you were a child, and hopefully one you do as a believer.  I got an extra one in the Jordan River!  

And if we are being honest, while we grieve differently, because we have this hope in eternal life as Christians, it doesn't mean that we aren't devastated.  Death hurts.  Childloss hurts.  Losing the parents who gave us life hurts.  Some are more explainable.  Death after a good, long life, for instance.  But some losses are just plain going to tear us apart for the duration of our earthly life.  And that's okay.  It doesn't mean you're doing it wrong.  It doesn't mean you don't believe hard enough.  It doesn't mean you don't trust God.  It means you've been living in a broken world, and the worst has happened, and it has broken your heart beyond repair on this side of Heaven.  And friend, don't let anyone make you feel bad about that.  

It's okay to be sad; it's normal to be depressed.  The tears will continue to flow years later, and sometimes you’ll get angry.  You’ll doubt.  You’ll plead and cry and try to understand the why.  God doesn't judge you for that.  He gets it.  He's been there.  He invites you to have conversations with him about it.  He won’t get mad.  After all, he knows you’re thinking it.  Relationship means getting to know each other, and God created us for relationship.  He desires your companionship.  He understands what it's like to be human, filled with emotions and brokenness.  That's why he sent Jesus to deliver us from all of it.  The day will come when we leave this earthly life and start our eternal one with him.  At that time, it's all going to make sense.  We will see it clearly.  We will understand why it all had to happen this way.  Until then, you do you.

A friend asked yesterday how I was doing with the Heaven study, knowing about our loss.  I was honest.  I said sometimes it's really hard.  The subject matter brings back a lot of memories and thoughts, sadness.  And I explained to her that after 8 years of missing John, people still avoid it, still avoid me.  They look away when I bring up certain topics, and I'm sure they're thinking get over it already.  I still get deer in the headlights with some people when I say his name.  That still hurts.  I told her not everyone can handle it, and she shook her head sadly and got tears in her eyes.  She said, “That isn't right.  It shouldn't be that way.”  No, it shouldn't.  But you find out who will still listen.  Who won’t turn away.  Who can handle it.  Who REMEMBERS.  And that's everything.  Those people are gold.  

We are in a season of sadness right now, I'll admit.  Life has quieted down.  No more cancer, no more elderly parents, the grandkids are in school all day - it's just different.  No need to rush out the door.  No one to visit at the nursing home.  No house to clean out.  (Although I should be cleaning out my own - it's still filled with closets of clothing and boxes of Army stuff).  It is just different.  Brian told me this morning he was grateful for the dog jumping on his chest today, because it gave him a reason to get out of bed. I feel the same on a lot of days.  It's probably one of the reasons I haven't been writing.  It forces out the feels.  The tears flow, and frankly, while it's cathartic, it's not always welcome. It's exhausting.  

There was a quote today, in the homework of the Heaven study, and it says, "If we knew as much about Heaven as God does, we would clap our hands every time a Christian dies.  It's by George MacDonald.  What a place to get to.  I don't see it happening - but man, what a beautiful place. 

I shared a story with my small group at Bible study.  I told them how I heard a speaker earlier this year, Tanya Yerigan, who explained how we could rewrite pathways in our brain.  I wish I could find my notes for a clearer retelling, but here goes:   Her beautiful son lost his life in a shooting accident in their front yard.  It was hard for her every time she came up the driveway.  I could relate, every time I walked past John's bedroom.  But she said that spot is a sacred spot - it's where they met Jesus.  He reached out his hand and took them home from that very place - and that's special.  So each time I go past John's bedroom and look at his bed I think how cool it is that Jesus met my son right there in that room.  That is was the best day ever for John.  Maybe you have a pathway you need to rewrite too.  If you get a chance to hear her speak, go.

Friend, please put your hope in Jesus today.  The Bible says that all who call upon his name will be saved.  It's so easy.  Lay down the hurt and the unbelief.  Lay aside your pride.  Know this, the evil one desires you.  He is the father of lies.  Whatever you believe about God not being real, or the resurrection not being true, it's a lie straight from the pit of hell, and all it will get you is torment.  

And for those of us struggling, know this - it won't always be like this.  It'll be better than you can possibly imagine.  Your suffering will not be wasted.  God will redeem it.  Every last bit of it.  

Maybe your struggle isn't grief.  Maybe it's relationships or rejection. Maybe it's conflict or strife.  Maybe it's mental illness or financial worries.  It could be your self-image, self-worth, addiction, whatever it is, HE sees you.  He loves you.  He cares about you.  He wants you to come to Him and lay those burdens down.  He'll take them up and carry them and you.  He's got this.  All you have to do is believe it.  That's not so hard, right?  You've believed a lot of other things, and they turned out not to be true.  They turned out to harm you - but HE WILL NOT.   Trust him.  Have hope!!!!  

May God bless you today, may you feel His presence around you, may HE give you peace today that surpasses all understanding,  

We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure . . .Hebrews 6:19 . . .the sea is rough, anchors aren't for calm days, they are for storms.