Day 1599 - Dear John
Dear John, 1599 days have passed since we lost you. I miss you. I can't put into words how much I miss you. It's a ripping, a tearing, a knife through the heart kind of missing you. I dreamt about you last night. Somehow, a bag of your things showed up and there were two shirts in the bag that smelled like you, still. I gave one to Dad and told him to smell it. I was busy pressing my face into the other one. I might even miss your smelly feet . . . I was holding your nephew over the weekend, and I was looking deep into his eyes. Your sister and I have been wondering if he's going to have his Daddy's brown eyes, or have hazel eyes like you did. On Sunday, as I held him, they were mostly green. And his eye lashes - wow. I asked him if I could have them and he said "yes, Grandma". As we sat there and I tickled his baby flesh, I was so reminded of you. I opened my mouth to tell him that Grandma used to have a little boy - and the tears instantly came